Feeling Normal In A World Of House Perfection
(Or...at least trying to feel normal)
Ok, I'll admit it right up front. Today's post may sound a bit "snarky" (translation: irritable). But, someone in blog world has to say it, so it may as well be me. So here goes. I live in a house that is not perfect. (Gasp!) And right now it is certainly not "photo worthy." As we speak, I have dishes in the sink that need washed, dust behind my bedroom furniture, piles of music stacked on boards across saw horses in my living room that my husband has been trying to "organize" for several weeks now and, to top it all off, I have every piece of furniture covered in towels and blankets to protect them while we nurse our sick Gracie cat through mouth cancer. Sound delightful? Want to see pictures? No way!
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Guess you can say I'm in a cranky mood today! So, why my need to share all of this with you? I don't know about you, but I think we all (translation:me) need a dose of reality about homes and styling them. I love to read about beautiful homes and enjoy seeing them on blogs, but honestly, sometimes it can get a little discouraging. Everything looks just too perfect. I look at blog photos and there is not a speck of dust to be found. The bedrooms look like they came out of a magazine, the children's play areas look like no toy is ever touched, the laundry areas don't show any dirty laundry, and the living rooms look like at any moment the doorbell could ring and guests would be ushered in to be offered a cold glass of tea and homemade cookies made in a spotlessly never used kitchen. Does anyone really live in these homes?
My husband and I have been blessed to own three homes during our married life and each one has been what is considered a "fixer upper." As in.....the fixing upping continued from the moment we moved in until the day we sold the house. In other words, I have basically lived in construction zones for most of our 34 years of marriage. Our current home (and one that we plan to live in ad infinitum) was the one most in need of fixing up. Perhaps not the greatest plan for us as we entered the middle life years, but there you have it. Anyway, we are now fourteen years into the fixing upping and although most of the upstairs and the family room, shop area, laundry area downstairs is pretty much done, we still have much left to do with the garage, dining room and staircase in our home. In other words, yes, we are still living in a construction zone much of the time. And, after fourteen years of living in the house, the painting that was done when we first moved in now needs redone. So....add that to the imperfection list. And yes, I will admit that I am envious of those who say they move into a house and it is now a year later and it is magazine photo perfect! (You may now picture me screaming and stomping my feet while wearing a bathrobe.)
My husband, bless him, likes to do most of the fixing upping on his own. Which takes time....especially when there are other jobs to go to and other interests to be pursued outside of fixing up the house. I'm not complaining (well, maybe a little) ....we live a life full of blessings. We are blessed to have a home. But, sometimes, I just wish I could blink and everything in the house would look perfect.....just like in those magazine and blog photos.
Being a perfectionist in a house of imperfection is not easy. I struggle to see the "beauty" and not the dust bunnies, windows that need cleaning (which will last for all of two weeks, maybe) and sawdust from house projects. My husband has this amazing ability to look at all of the projects and "see" the final product. While, I look at the projects and "see" the weeks of work involved and the mess that will be created in the meantime.
There is a life story to be told here and I am hoping and praying to be able to share it one day. Perhaps, I'll even write a book about it. And, at some point in time, I plan to do a series on the blog about the work that has been done on our home. My husband really is an amazing do it yourselfer!
But, for now, I'm just going to whine a little. And maybe go wash the dishes. Perhaps vacuum some dust up. It's Friday and I'm tired. And cranky. And my house is far from perfect. But, it is a house that we live in. Maybe, I'll just look at some pretty house pictures on the net. And dream....
Can anyone out there relate?
Until Next Time,
Debbie
9 comments:
I can clean up and hide things when guest come over, but no my house is never perfect either Debbie!! Besides what is the fun of that? And how did we learn that?
I always remind myself that on my death bed, am I going to be glad that I dusted? No way!! So dusting and cleaning are a rare occurrence...LOL
Jodie
www.jtouchofstyle.com
Jodie, you have an amazing ability to always make me feel better! Thank you!
I know exactly what you mean Deborah. I just did a post this week about the messy house of a blogger with some friends. I think my home is messier and much more cluttered now than it was before I started a blog. Don't get discouraged by all those Pinterest worthy photos! It's all a smoke screen! There is a great big mess right out of the picture frame! Lol!!
Thank you, Mary. I'll look for your post. And I know you are right...we all put our best foot forward on our blog photos even though there may be a mess right out of the picture frame! Thanks for your encouragement!
The book would be at the seller and I would be first in line to buy it! You have to promise to autograph it for me. I love this post so much, and this is me to a Tee, a perfectionist in an Imperfect household. Right now there are dishes in my sink too and I just had deodorize with baking soda and vinegar from an awful stench in the garbage disposal. So sorry about Gracie's cancer, I know you're the best nurse for her.
Andrea, I'll have an autographed copy for you! Thank you for your concern about Gracie. We all have things to deal with in our homes don't we?
I'm late chiming in here. I think a lot of times the programs we see on tv make us think we should be doing more, or they make us long for the highest end finishes and leave us unsatisfied with what we're blessed with. If we don't have granite somehow we don't think our counters are "good enough." I've our appliances aren't the going trend, we think they are not good enough. I think a lot is what we see and how we are steered by these programs. That's their purpose, after all. My house was built in 1916 and still retains some of its humble charm. Closets are small, but it has beautiful trim and real beadboard. Sure not fancy, but it's home and certainly good for me. I thank God for what I've got, even though it's not the latest and greatest.
Although I'm a regular reader of your blog, I somehow missed this post. I can certainly identify with what you say. I used to think when I retired, I would get to all that deep cleaning and window washing. And now that I'm retired, it isn't happening. I would much rather spend my time on creative pursuits and hobbies, and that's what I find myself doing. By the way, I will also be in line for your book!
Thanks, Sharon! I definitely prefer to spend my retirement time enjoying more creative things than housework which is a thankless task! If I ever write that book, I'll have an autographed copy for you!
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